QOTD #31: On the journey of discovery, getting off track... and returning to one's true passion
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by PAM
"Who you are isn't finite. You'll be different a year from now, ten minutes from now. So, embrace who you are in this moment."
- Ronnie Sullivan (Brandon Quinn), 'Sweet Magnolias', S4:E7
Yes, I am one of them worriers in this world. I sometimes am unable to stay in the moment... I will admit. Okay, I just did... admit. By the time people say, "ahhh", "hmmm," with eyes closed and face seemed to be illuminated by a glorious light from up above after taking that perfect bite from a delicious main course of a fabulous dinner, I would already be imagining the dessert... and all the very many possibilities... such as someone choking if the dessert was a rice cake of sorts. My hyper imaginative mind will then race to far flung places such as 911 and someone being rushed to the Emergency Room due to some nasty tapioca pearl getting caught in someone's throat or something. So, if someone would ask my opinion about the steak and whether or not it was cooked to my liking, I wouldn't know how to answer. In fact, I hardly know what were served at dinner at all! But when someone gasped for air... that's it, I would be on my phone dialing 911 - emergency, someone is choking!!
As I binge-watched Season 4 of "Sweet Magnolias" to have my favorite young couple, Ty and Annie, keep me company as I work, work, work... into Valentine's Day, Annie's Dad, Ronnie, caught my attention as he set Annie's worried mind at ease. The gorgeous, kind and naturaly talented budding artist, Annie, was stressing her brains out over College applications. She was doubting herself whether this or that school would be a good fit for her as she wants to study photography... and what if she chose one school and then realized one day that photography was not her real passion? What then? She was imagining a thousand and one scenarios, and it drover her crazy.
I can relate with Annie... not that I'm a 17-year-old girl deciding about college! No, not that, of course! I was fifteen (15) years old when I started college... and I just wanted to study! I didn't have the crisis that Annie had. My National College Entrance Examination (NCEE) Test (yes, we had that in the Philippines when I was in High School) score and qualitative analysis indicated that I can pursue anything... and I positively felt that way, too. I chose chemical engineering in two universities where I took entrance examination, political science and journalism in another. I passed in all... but I decided to study chemical engineering at the University of Santo Tomas (UST)... not that I knew what I was doing. I let my faith work, and it led me to teaching chemical engineering in the same University later. The rest is history as they say.
Decades ago, it was easier to choose between what was practical and needed, and what I was (am) passionate about. I chose 'practical and needed', hands down... because I love my family and I have always been committed to my family. I never regretted my choice because, over the years, as I wholeheartedly fulfill my obligations, I discovered myself... and the many gifts that God gave me that enabled me to accomplish many things. Everyday, I felt excited because of the hope to discover something new. Without a doubt, who I am and who I can be is finite as only God is infinite. But putting trust in God as I embarked to the journey of discovery, I felt that the hope in my heart - that is centered in God's love, made me believe that 'anything is possible'. Indeed, 'the possibility is endless' as they say... and if we worked hard, we can realize many of those possibilities. Sometimes, our choices cause us to stray away from the road that leads to the better version of ourselves. This is when prayers lift the clouds in front of us, fortify our vision... and the road to happiness reveals itself in front of us. The journey continues. Perhaps, that's what Ronnie Sullivan meant when he said to Annie, "what you are isn't finite". One moment, we are plunged in a sea of confusion, but with a small prayer and lots of faith, we are bathed in a light of clarity... a beautiful experience that only God's love can afford us.
I can say that the journey of discovery has been awesome! These days though, there are a few remaining reasons to stay practical... but the call to pursue passion gets louder and louder. I feel that there is more to discover. And, to continue discovering... I have to change course.
Oh, and Happy Valentine's Day, y'all!
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Image credit: The photo of Ty (Carson Rowland) and Annie (Anneliese Judge) is borrowed from Tudum by Netflix - thank you.
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