“They all come to an end at some stage. You hope they don't happen, but they do. It was a great run...."
- Roger Federer, after being overcome by the rising tennis superstar from Sweden, Robin Soderling, in the 2010 French Open Men's Quarterfinals, right at the center stage of Roland Garros' red clay.
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by Philipina A. Marcelo
I think I know what RF means... yeah, I really think I do!
But, oh, no, no, no... I'm nowhere near RF's star streaked professional path - not even remotely close... not even in my wildest dreams - oh, no, not at all! But I know what it's like to be pitted right on a track where you're expected to work like an unfeeling human dynamo, delivering the goods to some people's delight without a question, when all you really want to do is enjoy life's gifts and see how far you could reach with all your cylinders fired up and blazing. Of course, in the beginning everything is fun and fulfilling - the adrenalin rush, the excitement, the laughter, the challenge of clearing formidable hurdles... and the conquest! And you keep going, tasting success, savoring it... pushing further - driven by impossible dreams and good intentions, powered by idealism, sustained by prayers and faith.
And then just when you're about to yell your gut out from all the exhilarating run, life suddenly becomes merely about satisfying people's expectations! Sometimes, the expectations are reasonable and worth the efforts, and you feel compelled to commit and go for them... but in most cases, they are just utterly ridiculous! It becomes sad when life is taken over by seemingly compelling reasons to oblige... luring you to wander away from the roots of your happiness - love. And then, when reasons become non-reasons, then the whole experience becomes just a tragedy... and you float like an empty shell with the shallowest reason for existing. And you just wanna get out... the sad thing is, exits are not conveniently accessible - they never are... and so, you grope for them blindly, stumbling miserably, and without any help from people whose gruesome hunger you fed in those days of naivety.
Fortunately, it is during these moments when love comes to your rescue... taking you by the hand, guiding you out of your misery, and out of your nightmares! And then life becomes rosy once again... and you know that's where you want to stay. Of course, you have gone through so much to know that it will not always be as rosy, but it's easier to imagine that it would always be a happier place, therefore, it's worth devoting one's life to. And so, everything else becomes just a memory. The achievements still bring an awesome feeling of rush and exhilaration whenever you think of them just because you have accomplished all of them very well - even under extremely discouraging circumstances - with the best intentions in mind, and with deserving people thriving from the fruits of your labor... but that's all that they ever will be - just memories. And it feels just about right - perfect, in fact!
***
For the first time since 2002, I missed seeing Roger Federer in action in a Grand Slam Quarterfinals - it's a tennis fan sacrilege, I know! Dang! ;) But I had no choice, I had to satisfy a few expectations - not very unreasonable, but they still interrupt living, obviously! :) I had time to listen to RF's interview after his QF match though... and it's amazing to see how relaxed he was (not a single tear fell, hehe...), taking on questions about his unsuccessful QF run against the same opponent who tried and failed to stop him last year in winning his first ever French Open title - the rising Swede tennis superstar, Robin Soderling - the same guy who masterfully ousted the King of Clay himself, Rafael Nadal, last year from his very own kingdom in the City of Lights!
Maybe RF's composure come from being on top of a heap of incredible talents in men's tennis for the longest time now and from earning an iconic place in the tennis world as possibly the best player the world has ever seen. When one gets to a place like that, it must be easier to be experiencing defeat... just because those experiences no longer send questions on one's capabilities. They are mere glitches as a person like El Maestro, whose sublime talent and intrinsic genius is recognized by everyone, pushes his engine to its limits until its mileage is exhausted beautifully and good!
Still, maybe RF can afford to joke and give just a gentle shrug - almost nonchalant - as Soderling marches on to the semis because at the back of his head, with his new role as a father to beautiful twin girls and a husband to an obviously devoted and supportive wife, there is life after professional tennis! And maybe, pursuing such life would be as exhilarating as amassing Grand Slam titles at a rate that no one else could probably surpass in the future... and so, at this point, RF can afford to sit back and watch Robin Soderling battle it out with Rafa Nadal in the formidable red clay of Roland Garros, while he imagines hanging up his professional tennis racquet in a not-so-distant future? While my tennis fan's heart grieves over that, I can only wish RF the very best when he decides to do that... afterall, it has been a GREAT RUN - unparalled in its awesome glory! While that will become just a memory in the future, it will be a great memory - for him and his multitude of fans.
***
Now that an old phase is coming to a close in my own career, I cannot help but wonder about Roger's run. While I certainly do not feel sadness or regret as I watch the end loom in the horizon, it's hard to rummage through tons and tons of memories, throwing away those that will wear my heart down as I move on, and keeping those that will give greater meaning in welcoming and pursuing this new phase that's about to unfold. I can't even lament the lost time when I think about those kids and their loved ones who might have benefited from my years of idealistic idiocy! I'm just too happy to see them all successful and excited about their own careers now... but, just the same, the idiocy has got to come to an end. And it will... and that's that.
Just thinking about the prospects of new beginnings brings immeasurable happiness... it's pure joy just to commence it! I do not only bring with me "awakened idealism", good intentions, faith and the benefits of great experiences as I navigate this approaching new phase, but I also bring wisdom that sprang from wonderful lessons learned... and, more importantly, I know it will bring me closer to a place I have been longing for - that place that will lay down my roots in the soil of this new phase - love. In that place, there will be no sad experience that will tear my heart apart - never again. And that's where I will stay... to take roots, to grow and flourish, until such time when all but love alone perish to mere memories once more.
Fourteen years... hundreds of students... hundreds of engineers, most of them chemical engineers - all successful now! Whew! And yeah, it may have reached the end but it absolutely has been a great run! And with a few more new concepts I'll be leaving behind as I prepare to fly, it will be an awesome finish, too! And, I certainly am all set and fired up for the next lap... so bring it on! :)
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